I figured that should be ample time to get around the 2025 Beer Guide entries.
Going against convention, my first pub picture is of somewhere that I didn't actually set foot in.
But just look at the Nags Head...a stunning art deco design to match Nottingham's finest...
As visually appealing as the place looked, I didn't want to deviate from my plan and miss the town centre beer guide ticks. Plus, a quick glance at Untappd suggested this wasn't a secret real ale destination.
Barry F has checked in Fosters lager 781 times to date.
Four stars every time and I bet he's never had to return a dodgy pint of it, like us suckers on the cask.
Just up the road from the Nags, around a mile out of town, was my first destination - a brewery in an industrial estate next door to the Gui pudding factory.
Belgian Brewer (Links Industrial Estate, Bishop's Stortford, CM23 5NZ)
The eponymous Belgian Brewer grew up in Belgium before moving to the UK aged 21. Presumably unimpressed with Fosters in the Nags and the continental bottles available in the supermarket, they set about brewing trad Belgian styles in the home counties, establishing the brewery in 2018.
It's your typical industrial estate brewery tap from outside - big rectangular building, red shutters, gazebo, planters, portable bar in a trailer. Inside, it has a fair bit of character and I rather liked it. A friendly welcome. Great selection of beers. And a fine collection of Lowlands breweriana attached to the chipboard walls.
There were a fair few people in, most of whom seemed to know one another; a couple of chaps in their purple Bishop's Stortford FC shirts (I trust the Blues are doing better than last year).
Unusually, I stayed sensible with such a choice of high ABV beers on offer, ordering the mildly hopped, floral pale ale. The brewer's lowest strength beer at 5.6%.
A couple of stronger ones went into the backpack for later.
It was time to move on and explore the town centre.
Bishop's Stortford is home to around 41,000 folk and - if I'm counting correctly - a pretty hefty 16 pubs.
The one I was heading to was through dimly lit side streets, the multi-coloured lights of The Castle luring me toward it.
The Castle (38 Castle Street, Bishop's Stortford, CM23 3TG)
Wow - this was a buzz of activity when I opened the front door - a contrast to the quiet street I was coming in from. All the tables were occupied in the main room, conversations in full flow, lots of laughter, nobody paying any attention to the football on the TV screens. The pub dog came to check me out, found me thoroughly uninteresting, and wandered back to his spot in the corner.
The two cask ales on offer came from Wharfe Brewery (formerly Red Fox) and Royston's Buntingford Brewery.
I felt a bit guilty ordering the Wharfe 'Leading Light' when it took forever to pour ("it's a lively one").
Then took this through to the snug to one side, the only place with a table free. It's a nice little room with a bit of bench seating and a hatch to the bar to save you making the ten steps around the corner. A room spoiled by the group of blokes who insisted on shouting to each other at full volume and were very, very rude about Angela Rayner.
Next up, a stroll along residential Portland Street, down to Market Street, then 'round the corner to The Star.
The Star (7 Bridge Street, Bishop's Stortford, CM23 2JU)
Now we're into proper ancient pub territory, with this inn dating back to 1636. Not that you'd necessarily know once inside, as this has had a refurb or two to turn it into a town centre all-rounder.
There was an impressive beer line-up...Pride, Proper Job, Hobgoblin, Oscar Wilde mild, and two Brentwood brews. Neat little luggage tags; no jam jars.
I picked the Brentwood 'Beer Outta Hell' - of course I did, it's a chilli and ginger porter. Nice enough, but I would have heaped a bunch more ginger and chilli into the mix.
The Star is laid out in a U-shape with a courtyard out back. The right side was a bit more pubby yet, after doing the rounds, I perched on a stool in the brightly lit bit with sofas, wooden beams, Everton on the telly, and excessive Halloween decorations.
The Star is laid out in a U-shape with a courtyard out back. The right side was a bit more pubby yet, after doing the rounds, I perched on a stool in the brightly lit bit with sofas, wooden beams, Everton on the telly, and excessive Halloween decorations.
I failed on my original mission for Beer Guide completion of the town.
Necessitating a return visit for the Sports Trust club bar and an opportunity to investigate what the Nags Head looks like inside.
Instead, I took the easy option of finishing the evening in Spoons.
The Port Jackson (Riverside Wharf, Bishop's Stortford, CM23 3GN)
This is a purpose-built JDW in the complex of Italian chain restaurants and apartments constructed next to the swans on the River Stort. The Port Jackson first opened the doors in April 2014, although - once inside - this didn't feel like somewhere which was a building site ten years ago.
WhatPub suggested it was hit and miss in regards to cask ale excitement, so I guess I struck lucky with a couple of dark Halloween-themed guest ales at £1.99 a pint. The Nethergate 'Complete Howler' was a wonderful warming dark ruby porter on top form.
The main bar features a grand old staircase with a balcony level. Very peaceful and quiet upstairs when I wandered up there, although there must have been some wrong-uns a little earlier when half a dozen HP Brown Sauce packets rained down on my neighbour.
Saturday night in Bishops Stortford - it's a jungle out there.
With four pub visits, that was the end of my explorations for the time being.
With Belgian beers, back-street locals, and a couple of decent dark beers drunk, I'd passed a pleasant couple of hours in the town.
Unfortunately, not finding lots to complain about scuppers the planned 'Bashing the Bishop' post title.
Saturday night in Bishops Stortford - it's a jungle out there.
With four pub visits, that was the end of my explorations for the time being.
With Belgian beers, back-street locals, and a couple of decent dark beers drunk, I'd passed a pleasant couple of hours in the town.
Unfortunately, not finding lots to complain about scuppers the planned 'Bashing the Bishop' post title.
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